Husband of the Blogger Linkup: What is a Wife?


I'd like to begin today by saying, happy 29th birthday, Andrew! I'm so thankful to have been able to celebrate 12 of them with you, and I look forward to so many more.

Today we're asking our husbands about "a wife's place" and what their thoughts on Ephesians 5: 22-33 means to them in our current society.

Join Rebekah of Hargraves Home & HearthAmber of Embrace this Joyful LifeBella of Over the Teacups, and myself and interview your husband! You can also join our exclusive facebook group, or just pop over to each of the ladies's blogs and say hi.


A Wife's Place

1. In reference to Ephesians 5:22-33, what is your interpretation of "wives, submit to your husbands?"

Naughty face and chuckling ensues.

Still smirking and chuckling to himself.

Raises an eyebrow, looks at me: I feel like you'd get more sarcastic comments from your brother."

I wasn't really prepared for questions like these.

To be fair, I just drop them on him the week I'm posting...He doesn't get previous time to think about his answers.

I don't know...Um.

I guess my interpretation of it is...pauses to think...that God has set man as head of the household and that - not that the husband is in authority - because like, you and I, we do this thing as a team and we sit down together to discuss things...it's more of, like, "hey - we're in a rock and a hard place, let's talk about it." And I come to a decision...I don't know if that's a good example or not...

I don't want to say that the husband has the final say and that's it, really it's, if in the best interest, husband comes up with a game plan or whatever.

You're saying, like, we sit down and you hear my side and share your side, and from that, you make the final decision.

Yea! I guess, not trying to undermine my - submitting would be not trying to undermine your position that God has put me, as head of the household.

*in otherwords, make me a sandwich* said in the voice of Mr. Nezzer (Veggie Tales)

But seriously, a sandwich sounds really good right now.

2. How do you feel about the word, submit?

I don't see it as a negative thing, I mean, in retrospect, the husband is asked to love his wife as Christ loves the church, and giving myself up for you, basically in humble servant-hood. 

So, the submitting, like….I don't feel like it's a taking away from you being who you are. You're my wife.

But it's not…I guess, I don’t' know a good way of saying it. I'm not saying that, I come home and bark orders at you and you need to do everything I tell you to. That's not how it is at all.

The submission thing is recognizing that God has put me in this position, and if I feel lead by God to make a certain decision, you should submit to that decision, as the Lord's leading.

3. In your opinion, what does a "wife" look like?

Chuckles…

I don't know why, but I always get this…this picture in my head of like, 1950's, kicking open the door, holding a briefcase, with you in your 50's dress, with a bow tied behind with an apron…it's so cliché, leave it to beaver…

Would you like it if I dressed like that?

Mischievous face: I'm not saying I wouldn't dislike it…You remember that white dress you made?

Yea, I have it in the closet… (the one that I wore in our engagement photos - see below)

That's the picture, but with the whole apron thing.

More in reference to the Scripture, what does a wife look like?

Oh. Right.

Not to hold you to a high standard, but like the Proverbs 31... I don't know. In reference to the scripture…I mean…I feel like a wife just needs to be supportive, I mean, I feel like wives do play a support roll.

Um.

I guess the best thing that I can say, is that…

This is the stupidest question ever.

And there you have his whole mentality about my interviews. 



4. In reference to the verses above, what should a Godly Husband "look like"?

Like what I said earlier. Is that, the husband is called to be, like Christ loves the church.

What does that look like? Realistically, how do you love me like Christ loves the church?

Like I said, in humble servant-hood, putting your needs before my own.

I guess, giving all of himself for his wife. Meaning not only providing financially, but providing that security and protection and showing love any way possible. Not talking like, sappy, gooey "oh I love you." But I mean like the every day, I'm taking out the garbage for you because I love you. I'm help washing the dishes for you because I love you. Or the *scrunches face*

I guess what I'm trying to say is being genuine, not just in the good times, but the hard times. When you don’t want to love the other person, when you're mad at them, you still love them.

5. Together, how can we better reflect the husband and wife in Ephesians?

Like we as a team?

Yep, like, you and I together.

Ah. I don't know about you, but I forget about these verses a lot. It's one of those things that I feel like, we're married, and I kind of take that for granted sometimes. And me, not only being reminded that I need to love you more like, Christ loves all of us but then acting on that reminder.

And I don't know, I guess, for both of us. Obviously, if I do that then, your part in submitting would be a heck of a lot easier.

Shrugs.

Make me more sandwiches. 

Walks away.


And there you have it, ladies and gents. In all reality, Andrew is an incredibly understanding, open-minded person and he has a huge respect for the Scripture. He sees my value in our marriage, and he respects my opinion immensely. He has never been unfair in his expectations of me as his wife, or been demanding and chauvinistic.

My favorite point that he mentioned today is this:

The submission thing is recognizing that God has put me in this position, and if I feel lead by God to make a certain decision, you should submit to that decision, as the Lord's leading.

What he is saying here, and I believe what Scripture truly means by "submission" is that as wives, we are submitting to the direction that God is giving, being carried out by our husbands. It's less about bending to our husband's will, and more about following the direction that he feels the Lord pressing on his heart.

I love that about Andrew.

We are going to take a break over the holiday season and will reconvene in January.


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