A Letter to My Future Daughter In Laws

I am the mother of four boys. I have, at times, been disappointed that I will never experience the connection of having a daughter, picking out a prom dress, meeting her date the first time, going shopping, just the two of us.
There was some grief when I learned our next baby was not a girl simply because of the dreams that I had begun to have about the possibility. I hoped that our boys would have first hand experience loving a girl, treating her with respect and protection, and loving her wildly. I hoped that our fourth one would grow up best friends with my niece who is only 8 months older...

But when we announced that baby number 4 is another boy, we received so many affirmations that we are MEANT to be boy parents.

There were so many sweet comments of, "you're such a good mom of boys," "they're such sweet boys," and someone commented, "just think of the daughter in laws that you will have!"

So I did. I began thinking and dreaming of, and praying for my future daughter in laws.

And now I have new dreams. Dreams of sweet daughter in laws and getting to invest in their lives in a special way.

Dear Daughter In Law,

I have been praying for you for as long as I can remember. I cherish you so. Never having a daughter of my own, I so looked forward to the day that you would join our family. There is something extra special about my family expanding with you joining it.

I have prayed for your purity, for your strength, and your faith.

My hope is that I have trained my son well to serve you, as God calls him to do. I pray that he is a good, fair, Godly leader, striving to walk in faith and wisdom to protect you and the family that he has begun with you.

I am so looking forward to the relationship that you and I will develop. Never having a girl, it will be an adjustment and learning experience for me that I am so dreaming for.

I hope that we can grow close and be great friends. I never want to be your mom. I want to be a confident, a prayer warrior, and an advocate for you. I hope we have sweet, deep talks over coffee and that you trust me to come to me when you are struggling.

I hope that we can do things together as friends would, shopping, baking at the holidays, coffee visits. I know that you will have your own family and that your mom will always be the most important - and I so honor that. But, I hope that you can come to trust me in that way.

Know that I will be praying for you for as long as I live.

I cherish you, sweet girl.


  1. This is such a sweet letter, Kayla. Don't lose heart! I grew up with a family that has five boys (rambunctious, noisy, someone's always getting hurt, kind of boys) and their mom is very much a girly-girl. She instilled in those boys the need to treat women right and most of them found their loves and married pretty young. Now she has several daughter-in-laws (and girlfriends) and gets to do all the girly things with them and even has some female grandbabies too! God will surely put some sweet girls in your life even if they aren't biologically yours. <3

    1. Thanks Lecy! <3 I love hearing things like that!!! :) That is my hope for my boys too. And I so look forward to the girls that will be coming to my life!!!

  2. I was blessed with both a son and daughter (they're grown now), and our third "child", our daughter-in-love is so precious to us also! Your heart for your future daughters-in-love is already being shaped by the Lord, and I was touched when you said you wanted to be her advocate. An advocate is one who speaks only of the good... Your future daughters will love you for that!